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Was just praying just now. And i was quite discouraged about alot of things and i was complaining to god how i had all these flaws and sins in my life. And that they were stopping me from doing more for him. U know how it is when not alot is going your way and u start going about how bad u are that's why God's not using you. Blah Blah, i was was doing my fair share of it, then i think it really provoked God. I just felt something spoke in to my spirit like " what makes u think u are not good enough? And what makes u think that u not being used not because u have all these sins and not because i'm saving something bigger for you?" It was along these lines. I was quite shocked. I was really encouraged. I was singing this song and one of the lines went" Nothing that you have done could ever close the door." I just felt that that God looks beyond our sins and even in the midst of our imperfection, i think God can still use us. i Still remember something Xin Hong told me and that is when God saved us, God knew exactly what he was getting in to. He saved us for who we are. I just felt in my heart that God is a very stable God, He isn't panicking about a wrong bet he bought when we fall to sin. He knows that we will fall and yet still want us. i feel right now like i'm really good enough. But God in the meantime please really clean me up!
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But I keep under my body, and bring [it] into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.
(1 Cor 9:27)
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